Today I ended up watching this Ted Talk because it was mentioned at the end of an article I was reading about how to improve your mood. The guy who wrote the article was actually sharing his own Ted Talk. The talk was called, “Why we all need to practice emotional first aid”. It was a talk given by a man named Guy Winch. One of the things he talked about during his talk that stood out to me was how we talk to ourselves. He pointed out for example how after a rejection we’re hard on ourselves. He said what if you called a friend after a man/woman rejected you on a date and told them what happened and your friend said, “Well what did you expect…you’re out of shape…you’re boring…why did you expect them to like you anyway?”. He said you would be shocked if a friend said something like that to you… and he’s right I most definitely would be. But while most friends wouldn’t dare say anything like that the thing is those are the words you say to yourself. We are our own toughest critic. In that situation a friend would build you up, point out your good qualities, comfort you, and tell you that man/woman didn’t deserve you anyway. Very rarely do we do that for ourselves and that’s Guy Winch’s point. We need to learn how to support ourselves emotionally just as a friend would. Our emotional/mental health is of the utmost importance.
Another thing this talk made me realize is how dependent on others we are for emotional support. Instead of supporting ourselves, comforting ourselves, building ourselves up, and remembering our good qualities we rely on others to do it for us. I think its good to have a support group but I also think its good to be independent. We need to learn how to support ourselves emotionally so that we know how to cope when we’re on our own. Everyone else can’t always be there for you so sometimes you need to know how to be there for yourself.
I’ve included this wonderfully informative Ted Talk below for your viewing pleasure. Hopefully you can take away as much as I did after watching it. If you have any comments, questions, or concerns for me please don’t hesitate. If you like the talk please do share it. Feel free to share this whole post as well.